moving on

Hola Bloggers,

Get ready for this one ..................I am going to the airport in about three hours to try and get on a flight to Spain. I don´t have a flight but I am sure that I can buy one at the airport.

No I am not through with South America and no I am not sure about what I am doing - but South America will be here forever and Jose Ramon will not be! I think you all know that Jose came out here for a week. Well he left yesterday and for various reasons I am going to follow him and give life with him a shot for a while. Some of you know the story, most of you don´t but cut a long story short - I broke his heart with something that I told him last week and we more or less ended our relationship. Anyhow, I have realised that men like him don´t come along very often. Men come along very often - I have never had a problem in that department but I know that Jose is very special and I want to give it shot with him. He is still in the mood to continue a relationship with me at the moment but if I stay here and let him be alone for very long then he is going to slowly change how he feels about me - due to the dramas of last week. Its only natural that that will happen. So, I think that its now or never.

It might not work out and I might be back here in a week or too. If that happens then thats cool but at least I will know I gave it a shot. I am not travelling on a shoe string - I can afford to fly backwards and forwards so there´s no big deal there.

I have thought about what I am doing and the objective of my trip was to try and obtain fluent Spanish, to live life in a totally different way to how life is as a lawyer in London and basically to stop working for a while. So, my objectives can all still be achieved in Barcelona. There is lots to see in Spain and there is no reason why I can´t travel there rather than here for a while. Also, there is no reason why I can´t return to South America. Its been here a long time and I don´t think it is going anywhere. In fact my Dad is all geared up to do Machu Pichu with me - so if I end up staying in Barcelona a while then I am sure that Dad and I will fly out to Peru in a few months time.

Don´t worry about me. Everything is cool - I just need to do this or else I will forever wonder what life could have been like with Jose and I feel that I will loose my chance at finding out if I don´t go now. Thats all. I don´t want to regret not taking a chance on him.

I don´t know if I will come to England at all while I am in Spain (I might only be there a week!). I don´t want to come to England mainly because I am not ready to go back to England and it might feel like my trip is over if I come to England - and I don´t want that. We´ll see though. There are lots of people who I would love to see - maybe you can come to Barcelona (babies and all)! I need to concentrate on working out things with Jose Ramon first though - as nice as you all are!

Stay tuned for the next installment - maybe I´ll be flying to another continent!

S xxxxx